Fasting.... day 1

Well, after my dad's death I feel that there is something new coming to my life... I don't know well what it is... but my life needs to take a firmer shape. I need to know what to do right now. After 5 years in Canada, my husband was finally accepted to do his residency in Family Medicine, so he got it!! this is one of the main things we wanted. Once my husband is in, the possibility to success and finally being a doctor in Canada are almost sure. Me, I'm a dietitian and after 3 y and a half I finally was able to be part of the college of dietitians here so I can work in my field. So, I got it! this is what I wanted... Things that look kind of impossible, we have made it! by the grace of God!  well... but after having what we wanted... it is harder... I worked as a dietitian for 1 year and then we moved to the city my husband was accepted to start his residency. Now, I haven't got a job... it looks like there are no jobs... my husband, he has came across some terrible nasty people that want to put him down and make him feel inferior and intimidate him in very unfair ways...  On the other hand, my relationship with God was super great some months ago.. I was experiencing heaven, that's what I think! and suddenly it is like God didn't come come that often... it debilitated me... But now, that my dad is gone, I have felt God's presence so strong.. I desperately need Him... I cannot make it without him...
So.. I felt  like I desperately needed to start a fasting and prayer time... it's now the time! I cannot wait anymore... I have almost never being able to fast.. I guess my flesh is very strong... I end up eating something by 10 am... but, some months ago after a special touch of God during a Sunday Service I could fast my supper for like 5 days... and it was great how my life was like wow!! God was literally flowing through me!! OMG! So, I need direction, I need to hear God, I need Him to flow through me, I need to see with His eyes, I need to listen with His ears, I need to feel with His heart, I need to think with His mind... and I know I can get this, denying myself, denying my flesh and making stronger my spirit... I want the chains to be broken.. and  to kick out the devil... I want to stand firm for what is coming... God is preparing me...
I started my fasting today.. I know, almost nobody would read this so, I can say it... it is not a great fasting... but I'm denying myself what I like the most, starch food and my supper. It might help to prepare myself for a real one, where I don't eat anything. I was thinking to do this for 21 days... I 've never been able... and I don't know if I will be... hopefully, in God's will, He will help me... For now I'm doing good and it is already 11;30 am. Lord, please help me! I want to make it through!